Motherhood Series
Volume 02.
Annika Hein

Annika Hein, the writer and founder of Jane Magazine, has recently become a mother of two. In this instalment of the Motherhood Series, Annika shares how she carves time out to bathe as a mother and describes how each child brings their own unique energy to the bathing space.

"Turning a necessary task into a ritual time and commitment, as opposed to quickly and disconnectedly doing it. We try to show this distinction to our children in the way we’ve created their nighttime routine. Placing an emphasis on the things that are calming, grounding, and soothing, but it’s easy to ignore the lesson for ourselves.

Relinquishing control helps me avoid obsessing over the details and thinking that bathing has to be this big grand affair to make it worth it. The truth is, five minutes is better than no minutes. The chance to drop back into your body is always worth it. I like my baths to be steaming hot, like too hot. And that feeling of stepping in and being embraced by the water as my skin prickles is something I struggle to put into words.

Subconsciously I think I save the moment for when I know I really need it. In those instances, it’s a much more prevalent need, more of a necessity, so it's easy to make the space."

"Bathing as a mother has become less solitary, and it’s something that I no longer take for granted. Having a bath alone is a luxury now, something to be savoured. But even when you’re alone there’s still remnants of little lives."

"For me, the time and effort involved. Just running the water alone takes longer than a shower. You have to wait for the tub to fill up and so it’s a commitment of time really. I like to set a mood with the salts and the smells and the sounds so it’s really an expression of self-love. An act of nourishment through a commitment or a pledge of service to the self."

"Bathing has changed with each child.

Vahla has always been soothed and calmed by the water, it’s one of the places where she is the stillest. So the bath has always been our place. We bathed together nearly every night for the first two years of her life and it was, and still is a chance for us to really be in our bodies together again. It’s like a grand exhale on the day and I can feel her whole body soften into mine. I love watching the steam catch on her eyelashes. I have so many memories of feeding my daughter in the bath, I actually think it was where she had one of her last before we weaned.

Erling on the other hand, is completely mesmerised by the water. He’s a cancer and the water really seems to energise him. He charges up and down the tub splashing and banging and bringing such a pure sense of play to the space. It took me a moment to understand that the bathing ritual with my son was going to be vastly different to what I’d create with my daughter. Once I really recognised his relationship to the water I could see how joyful the process was for him. It isn’t still or serene but it’s utter magic to witness. It’s like this big last final gush of energy and love and passion. It’s really special to watch and to be a part of."